A Day In The Life of Dan Phantom
by Xdon't-mind-meX
Summary: Ever wonder what goes on in our favorite villan's mind? Well now you can know! Here's his one and only journal! Enjoy the fun and comedy!


Dedicated to the wacky friend who writes wacky stories and inspired me! Mushroomcloudslooklikebroccoli, thank you! I also thank the Sesshomaru story quite like this one that I can't remember the name of. It helped figure out what kind of wacky story to write.

Disclaimer: I do not own Dan Phantom, his sexiness, or Clockwork.

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December 1

I am so totally the baddest ghost alive…er, dead. I am so sexy. No wonder all the fangirls flock toward me!

December 2

Getting bored in this thermos. Can't believe I allowed that weaker version of myself to defeat me. I WILL get out if it's the last thing I do!

December 3

Bored, bored, bored.

December 4

I wish I had my Chinese checkers set with me. Then I could clone myself and have a game.

December 5

Hey! I found a cookie!

December 6

Lookie! Another cookie!

December 7

Where the hell are they coming from??? You think that in a thermos I'd find a noodle or something. Hey butterscotch! My favorite!

December 8

Let's sing the cookie song! C is for cookie, that's good enough for me! C is for cookie, that's good enough for me! C is for cookie, that's good enough for me! Cookie, cookie, cookie starts with C!

December 9

I heard Clockwork pass by. Maybe I can persuade him to get me my Chinese checkers set.

"The answer is no."

"But—"

"No."

Geez, what a jerk! You think some people would be sympathetic enough to my current condition being eaten alive by boredom and all. Thinks he's so smart being the master of time! I hate how he answers before I even ask.

December 10

1 sheep…2 sheep…3 sheep…4 sheep (yawn) 5 sheep…6 sheep…7 sheep…8 sheep…AAAAAH! Rabid man-eating sheep! Clockwork help!

December 11

I am so not counting sheep ever again. That stupid sheep almost tore off my beautiful face! Then all my fangirls wouldn't worship me anymore and go off to worship my non-buff weaker self. Hey wait a minute…how did a ghost sheep get inside the thermos? Unless…Clockwork!

December 12

I'm so not forgiving him for putting that sheep in here.

December 13

Still not forgiven.

December 14

Still mad.

December 15

He's cracking, I can feel it.

December 16

For rude! I was a bit hungry today so I asked Clockwork if he's get me a butterscotch cookie.

Me and my Sexiness: "Clockwork, can I have a—"

CW: "Let me guess, you want a cookie."

Sexy King: "Can it be—"

CW: "Butterscotch?"

I'm Too Sexy for my Cape: "Stop doing—"

CW: "That."

See if I ever ask for anything from him again! And I'm still not forgiving him.

December 17

What was it that I was not forgiving him for anyhow?

December 18

Cape. Mape. Sape. Dape. Lape. Shape. Tape. Rape.

I'm too sexy for my cape, so sexy it..loses..shape?

I'm too sexy for my cape, so sexy I..use..tape?

I'm too sexy for my cape, so sexy I..want..to..rape?

"That's too many syllables and you're a horrible song writer."

"Well let's see you come up with one!"

How did he know I was doing that anyway??

December 19

I've go a lovely bunch of coconuts...deedle-lee dee…there they are a-standing in a row…bum, bum, bum…big ones small ones some as big as your head!

Gotta love Monty Python.

December 20

Coconuts the size of your head?? That's not possible unless your head is reeeeeeeaaaaaally tiny. Like Clockwork's.

Sexy Beast: "You hear that Clocky? Your head's a coconut!"

And I am a sexy pineapple.

December 21

I don't think he heard my insult. Maybe I should've screamed it louder.

December 22

(tune done to I Want Candy) I want cooookies! I want cooookies!

December 23

I remember this one time when I was destroying Amity Park I saw a Chinese restaurant. I blasted it into oblivion with my muscles of sexiness. There was a fortune cookie on the ground. Being curious, as I am, I picked it up and broke it in two. It said: Someday you will get eaten by a rabid sheep.

That was the last time I ever opened a fortune cookie.

December 24

Christmas Eve!

December 25

YY! It's Christmas! Where all the ghosts follow that stupid tradition of being peaceful towards one another. That means I'll be let out today! Then I can take over the world! Mwa ha ha ha ha!

CW: "Okay Phantom, it's time for the annual ghost get-together. Promise to be good?"

Sexy Pineapple: "Cross my heart and hope to die!"

I can't believe I'm actually out! Freedom! The first thing I shall do is get revenge on Clockwork!

Just call me Mr. Buff: "Ha Ha! You fool! You think I actually intended to—are those Santa shaped cookies?"

5 minutes later…

Yummmm! Butterscotch!

December 26

Beaten again! There's always next year I suppose.

December 27

Boredom.

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R&R please! 


End file.
